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InRobert Zemeckis made "Cast Away," the longest FedEx commercial in history that masquerades as a trapped-on-a-desert-island story. Granted, the middle section of the film where Tom Hanks is marooned isn't terrible, but the pair of audience-insulting bookending acts that surround it replace any good will that created with seething anger. Tom Hanks plays Chuck Noland, a man with no time because of his demanding job at FedEx, who is the lone survivor of a plane crash over the Pacific—and then washes ashore a small, uninhabited island in the middle of nowhere. His deteriorated mental state which weirdly happens within days makes him need to paint a face in his own blood on a Wilson-branded volleyball so he has something to talk to.

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